The following event took place today at the local Subway Sandwich Shop between the hour of 12:00pm and 1:00pm.
Grandma: "Go grab something to drink with your sandwich."
The Kid: "Okay Namma...I think I want the Hawaiian Punch."
Grandma: "Eh, I dunno. I don't like the idea of you drinking all that red juice. Why don't you pick something else? How about some apple juice?"
The Kid: "Awww..but I really want Hawaiian Punch."
Grandma: ::gives a look:: "Pick something else."
The Kid: "Alright." ::face brightens:: "I'll just get a Squirt then. My momma lets me drink that....and it's not red."
Grandma: "Your mother doesn't let you drink soda."
The Kid: "Yuh huh"
Grandma: "Are you sure?"
The Kid: "Uh huh." ::nodding with raised eyebrows and a smile that's missing teeth::
Grandma: ::frowns:: "Fine. Get the Hawaiian Punch. I think it at least has SOME real fruit juice in it."
The Kid: "Thanks Namma...you're the BEST!"
::shaking my head::
I can only hope he grows up to use his cuteness powers for good and not evil.
- Mood:
calm - Music:Counting Crows - Angels of the Silences | Powered by Last.fm
I saw him perusing the aisles and he seemed to hover over in the QP, Erotica, "Ellora's Cave" type of books - general area. I DID NOT get the impression that he was shopping for anyone other than himself and he didn't mention the fact that he was asking for gift ideas. I don't know if he was gay or straight, nor is it even relevant. I just know he was looking a little too enthusiastic about his purchases. Hell, I don't even get that giddy about
I swear, some of my best stories come from hanging out in Borders. When I worked there it was no different.
The crazy thing is...truth be told, I think most guys could really benefit from reading a romance novel or two every now and again. It may give some insight to the female psyche, as long as they don't take it too literally.
But still...
Just..no.
And of course this story would not be complete without additional comedy. When the kid and I left the book store and got in the car, he said to me, "Momma, why didn't you tell that guy to read 'The Smoke Thief?' You loved that book!"
::ded::
After I recovered from my mouth gaping open, and managed to stop laughing, I told the kid to mind his own business and that mommy gets creeped out by grown men who openly read "girly books." Not that it's right...it just is!
Good...gawd.
I going to have to seriously watch what I say around that kid.
- Mood: amused
The Time!
The Grammys!
::Passed out from Squee::
(To be updated as the show goes on)
Is it just me, or does nothing underscore spiritual messages in song like a black choir?
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Cyndi Lauper = MUCH MUCH LOVE!!
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I never would have thunk we'd still be seeing Jason Bateman outside of the 80's sitcom universe.
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I love Kanye's quirky ass.
God bless him!
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Keely Smith/Kid Rock/Dave Koz
equals
Most awkward Grammy Moment EVER!!
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Oh shit!! Herbie "effing" Hancock FTW!!!!!
YES!!! (AND YES WE CAN!!)
Don't burn the place down Kanye!!
- Mood: excited
I'm riding in the car with the kid and this conversation commences:
Kid: "Mommy, what's "booty?"
Me: "What?!"
Kid: "Mr. Krab on SpongeBob is always talking about his booty,"
Me: "Oh, he means "pirate's booty." He means his loot. You know, his money, treasures, jewels and whatnot."
Kid: "Oh."
::silence for about 30 seconds::
Me: "So, you think you wanna be a pirate?"
Kid: "No, I wanna be a baseball player. I'll bet they get LOTS OF BOOTY!"
Me: ::ded:: ::holding back wracking laughter as tears stream down my face::
Me: "Indeed they do, Honey....indeed they do."
Priceless.
*******************
Speaking of booty, I can't stand Sara Silverman, but can my love for Matt Damon climb any higher? I don't think it can.
That's.Just.Awesome. And Jimmy looked salted like hell. LMAO!
Matt D-A-M-O-N!!!
- Mood: amused
::phone rings::
Me: "Hello?"
Mom: "Do I have a big mouth?"
Me: ...
Mom: "I mean do I always let the cat out of the bag?"
Me: "Uhh....yeah."
Mom: "Awww, man!"
Long story short, office gossip came back to bite her in the backside. That's one of the dangers of working with your spouse. That and the fact that neither one of you seem to be able to keep your mouths shut around your office cohorts. It really sux when tension is already running high as a result of job insecurity.
Poor Mom. She just can't help herself. But in her defense, she didn't act alone.
So for all you big mouths this jam's for you! Something else you can run and go tell your crew!
- Mood: slightly amused
- Music:"Big Mouth" - Whodini
Henry Dancing...
Jesus God.
Somebody pleeeeaase...
Make it stop!!
I've died twice from laughing and resurrected.
Can't.take.any.more.
- Mood:
lmao
When I was in elementary school, there was this kid who brought her crayons to school in a Crown Royal bag. We had no idea what Crown Royal was and thought it was cool. We all wanted one too!
I thought about that the other day and laughed my ass off.
What da hell was that kid's parents thinking?
- Mood: cheerful
- Music:"If I Had My Way" - Chrisette Michele
Damnit.
As hard as I have tried, I am STILL not caught up on "Heroes." I have last week's episode to watch and last night's before I will be caught up with the rest of the world. Last night I watched the fourth episode from this season (2), "The Kindness of Strangers" which I can honestly say was the first one that I really got wrapped up in since the new season started. Just a couple of random thoughts:
Nathan Petrelli (Adrian Pasdar) has the LONGEST eyelashes I have EVER seen. It seems so unfair that men get the prettiest lashes. Thank God the beard is gone. I love a man with a beard, but not that Grizzly Adams look that you were giving darling.
Sylar - You're so bad you're good.
Micah could clean up in da hood reconnecting utilities with his "ability."
Damn Matt, who knew your ex-wife would turn out to be such a skank-ho! Cheatin' on your husband with no protection? Ewww!!! Good riddance to her. (Although I kinda get the impression she may have lied about the baby's paternity for some strange reason.) AND, yo' daddy is the "Nightmare Man." Sorry, dude.
And what is up with those big ass nuclear reactor cockroaches they always show?!!
Nathan and Matt working together: Yay!
Micah still not getting a haircut: Boo!
Monica sweet and also a "Hero": Yay!
No Peter Petrelli this episode: Boo!
Matt and Mohinder playing "My Two Dads": LOL!
Finally, what the hell was up with West's shirt?
Did wardrobe wash his shirt in super hot water AND forget to iron the damn thing? Look at how young that thing is on him! This shirt is struggling to stay buttoned...or is this some sort of fashion thing that I'm out of the loop on? This had me laughing for a good while.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to catching up on these latest two episodes. Then I'll have to wait a whole week for my "Heroes" fix just like everyone else. I just hope this show stays good for a long time. This is a very welcome distraction these days.
- Mood: animated
- Music:"Private Dancer" - Tina Turner
Recently I poked fun at the romantic book genre. On
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blackfolk, I questioned the literary and entertainment value of the urban fiction subgenre of African American books. But in the process of turning my nose up and giggling, I've developed a bit of curiosity about books that I normally would not give a second glance. Given my nature to be fair and my propensity to like many things that can best be described as cheesy or corny, I decided to delve into a book that I'd describe as paranormal romance. That experimental text turned out to be "The Dream-Hunter" by Sherrilyn Kenyon snagged from the local library book sale for the incredible bargain basement price of 1 dollar. 340 pages of 14pt font and standard romance novel dialogue spun in every unoriginal way, but that's not necessarily a criticism. It depends on what you look for in a book.
I have to say that so far this book offers little surprises. The Prologue suffers from the 'Rapid Catch-Up Syndrome' that you find in lots of movies that were adapted from popular books. (The last two Harry Potter films GOF & OOTP are excellent examples of this.) Although I find this a bit amateurish and jarring, I can appreciate the jump start into the plot.
I will point out that I only have to get to p.22 to hit romance paydirt…and a WHOLE page of it at that!
( Dream lover come rescue me… )
:-/
M'kay, here's the thing. I understand (I think) what the author was going for here, but for me she fails miserably. Not because I'm a book snob (I am), but this is just bad.
From the idiotic unromantic names of the characters to the soap operish dialogue it's just all BAD. Can anything be more cliche than a white flowing dress being pulled off of a woman? Or the wreckless abandon of a normally reasonable and cold hearted female? In this world of threats and peril, you mean to tell me that one can't even fantasize without dragging in the risk of pregnancy and/or disease? What a killjoy! And for Pete's sake, can we please get some new verbs and adjectives to describe sex/lovemaking/whatever? I challenge any of you writers out there to compose a scene that avoids the usage of the words "swollen" and "thrust." I'm sure it can be done.
And I don't know about most women, but I can't think of one part of my body that I would enjoy having "flicked." Massaged with firm, constant and steady pressure, definitely...but flicked...No. And hell, I'd rather be bitten than "nibbled." Clearly the author isn't going for PG-13, so just do the damn thing. (What?) And what is up with the leather pants???!! What YEAR is this? Let's see…'96. Were leather pants in for men back then? Perhaps this dream guy was stuck in a time, though he's supposed to be from Atlantis. (Yes, THAT Atlantis. Did they have leather pants in the underwater world??) Dunno…it just made me snort with laughter.
This passage does not make me hot. It makes me giggle out loud…a lot. And it's not that I think what she is experiencing would be unpleasant. I mean, who wouldn't want some superhot Greek god of a man waiting for you just as soon as you fell asleep? Quicker than you can say REM, there he is on standby and at the ready eager to serve and please. No questions…not a lot of talking (Please! Especially if you are going to say something as unbelievably silly as "Give me all your passion.") There just has to be a better way to tell a story. And perhaps the love scenes are secondary to the overall "story" but I don't think one really works well without the other.
So anyway, not to further beat a horse that's dead, this is why I generally avoid books tagged as "romance," but I do plan to soldier on. I will finish the book and I may even come to like it somehow, especially since getting it on with my own version of Dreamy McDreamlover sounds pretty darn good right about now…
…sans the leather trousers of course!
;-)
- Mood:
recovering - Music:"Dream Lover" - Mariah Carey
The benefit?
The piniest smelling office this side of the Detroit River. No kidding. I know he was in my office because he left a post it "hello" message on my monitor.
Meanwhile, this office is so overwhelmingly filled with the aromatic scent of industrial cleaning products, that my eyes are watering. My nostrils are burning like crazy and I hope my space heater isn't compounding the problem, 'cause it's cold in here.
But nonetheless, it's a sweet gesture.
It's nice when someone thinks about you, and randomly does something nice for you.
ETA: My new song for the day courtesy of the comment by
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msamericana- Mood: tired
- Music:"Damn Girl" - Justin Timberlake
...but perhaps not this one. 
I'm a magazine nut and I love the ones that seem really obscure (at least to me), so while I was in Border's the other day I picked up a copy of Audrey Magazine which is an Asian American lifestyle magazine and..., hold on..., wait for it...Romantic Times Book Review!
There is no way I could possibly describe the hours upon hours of juicy, romantic, cheestastic goodness that is this publication. It is teh awesome! I only made it to page 9 before I discovered the above posted sure to be award-winning, yet-to-be released, masterpiece. And NO I am not judging this book by it's cover (although I'm sure the judgment would be fairly accurate), I'm judging it by it's description. Check it out:
"He's making a list, he's checking it twice--and he's hoping you're more naughty than nice. He's your own personal Saint Nick--sans beard, belly, and red suit--and he's coming special delivery in this sizzling collection... "
Oh boy. Let the LOLZ begin. And in case you can't read the teaser text on the low budget cover, Santa says "Just tell me what you want..."
Oh sweetie, I doubt that you could handle my wish list.
ETA: I actually SAW this book at Barnes & Noble!
Could.Not.Believe.It.
- Mood: amused
Just another reason why I so love the British.
Tee.
- Mood: amused
- Music:"Don't Speak" - Leela James
